Loving him the wrong way

Yesterday we had a dinner party, One of my close friends asked me "Why do women feel like that need to rule their men"? I think this is goes way back to women independence days.. that was the 60's right? When women get into a relationship with a man, they want to keep the same type of control they had when they were single. But you want to be in a relationship right? That is my question, to those women. Sometimes it has to be a give and take and sometimes women need to know when to play their position. Let a man be a man and you my dear always be a woman. So loving him the wrong way can be a lot of different factors :

1. The woman wants to be the man in the relationship

2. Woman that does not want to compromise.

3. Knowing when to shut up. ( I have this problem myself.)

4. Listening to your mother, your friends and your sisters about your relationship can be really harmful. If the man is not physically abusing/emotionally abusing you, there is no reason to call them every time you have a argument.


At no way do I think a women should be subservient to a man, but I think we all need to know what our roles are in the relationship.

Finding the one to love you

Most women come up to me and ask " How do you find a "Good Man". I think a "Good Man" is all in what you are looking for.When I looked for a man, I looked for someone that was the opposite of what I said I wanted. This proved to be good for me. I would not suggest that for all women. But if you want to find what you are truly looking for make a list. Make a list of all the things you want in man and what traits are a priority.

1. Intelligent
2. Financially- Sound
3. Hard- Working (good work ethic)
4. Treats his mother and sisters well ( that can tell a lot about a man)
5. Children/ or no children


This was my list. If you have a list stick to it. Don't think that there are no men out there that fits your criteria. There are some. You have to be willing to go where you haven't been to find him

Once you find him... you have to keep him !

Keep him lovin' u

I had an older woman ask me in the beauty shop, " How did you get him to commit" ? To me the answer was simple. But I have to realize it might not be so simple for other women so here is my thoughts...
1. I never gave him a "cheap" feeling. I wanted him to know from the beginning I am a quality woman and while I had a good time with him I was not "easy" to win over.

2. I can take care of myself. I can pay my own bills and keep myself in the matter I would expect you to if I give you the chance.

3. I want you, I don't need you. This is a very important. Don't be needy.

4. Set your priorities and stick to them. But do not let your man know what you are after. If you are looking for a ring, don't ever bring it up in conversation.

5. Keep your figure up, rather we like it or not men want a woman who looks good.

6. Cook and clean. Keep your house clean and cook the man a meal. Also, make sure you have good hygiene.

7. Pay attention to you. Make sure your hair and clothing are neat and well fitted.

8. Make him your center when you are with him. Pay attention to the conversation. Don't have your head up in the clouds, have something to say.

How to make him love you thru food

I have noticed one thing. My [husband loves] to eat ! So I cook meals that his mother cooked for him as he was growing up. In order to get the secrets to the meals she cooked you will have to be nice to the mother- in - law. Be very respectful and get on her good side. Men love women who do not have alot of drama and can get along with their mothers.

How to make him love you

So the first step in having someone else love you is you to love yourself. Look at yourself in the mirror. What do you love about you ? Are you happy where you are in life at this moment? Are there things you would like to improve but have not taken the time to start on ?

Know thy Self....

A little about me...

As long as I could remember I wanted to be married, happy and lot's of kids. Most women want this and will do whatever it takes to meet "Mr. Right". I on the other hand didn't know what type of man I wanted, only that I wanted a husband. Starting on this road young, I was 13 when I started dating was not a good one. Man after man was disappointing not what I truly wanted. But really I never took the time to think about what I wanted in a man and what that man would want in me. Not until after my first marriage broke up. I surprisingly was happy my ex was gone and I felt free. Free to think about me and what would make me happy and what type of man that would be. During my first marriage I was happy to be propose to, and said yes immediately. But once in the marriage I knew I had made a big mistake.

After the divorce, I decided to take the time to find out what I truly liked. I found I love peanut butter and running. As silly as peanut butter might sound it is what I learned about myself. I thought about the life I wanted to live and what type of life would that be in twenty years. Did I truly want kids and if I was playing into a stereotype of what a woman should want for her life.